Our UUA/UUSM Common Read for 2024-2025 will be “On Repentance and Repair: Making Amends in an Unapologetic World” by Danya Ruttenberg (Beacon Press, September 13, 2022). We will be meeting for our first discussion on Saturday, October 12 at 10:30 am in Forbes Hall.
The challenge of apologizing and forgiving is one that is at a high water mark in our culture right now. The concept of having protocols for who should forgive, how to apologize, and what makes the apology meaningful is one that anyone can benefit from discussing.
Ruttenberg starts out with the framework offered by Maimonides, a Jewish philosopher whose influence stretches from the middle ages into the 21st century. She expands on his insights in some essential areas, and points out that while no one is required to forgive, those who do often benefit themselves.
Many people have felt the emptiness of a forced insincere apology or have themselves balked at being required to grant forgiveness when the damage feels unforgivable. Or there’s the gaslighting non-apology – “Sorry you’re so upset about that thing I did which wasn’t really a problem.” Ruttenberg addresses all of this and more.
It’s a valuable and hopefully enlightening conversation we are looking forward to. The discussions throughout the coming year, usually on the second Saturday of the month at 10:30 am in Forbes Hall, will be facilitated by Judith Martin-Straw and James Witker of the Adult Programs Committee.
The book is available at independent bookstores and through the public library.
